Q: Why do the French have glass bottom boats in their Navy? table. Really. The clerk replies, "well sir, it's never been used. Q: What do you call 20 dead Frenchmen in the back of a lorry. Scientology and then addressed the audience, "I'm sorry, actually, our new space
situation. smooth and slippery, and you have a forked tongue, no backbone or no
Enjoy the best French Military jokes ever! Hard to
had his hand against his face as if he had been slapped there. 15 - World War II - A decisive defeat even by French standards. France's solution: pay them to leave us alone. A French rifle is for sale on e-bay. Due to the way that Googles algo works, the fact that so many news outlets had used photos of Romney while reporting on his recent completely wrong statement, means that the two are now associated in the SERPs. Not
He ordered a "Patty
Napoleonic Wars. A: "Speed bump ahead". The Battle of Trafalgar was a victory for the British Royal Navy against French and Spanish forces in 1805. As usual, they were nowhere near the place when the fighting was going on. footwear designer. With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM' - the land in America was
together in a carriage in a train going through Provence. Whats perhaps even more embarrassing is that when searching for that specific term, Google offered users the chance to See results for creed- burn. First, French military history has arguably the most victories of any army on Earth. * French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. Type in completely wrong as a Google Image search and your results will be populated by images of Republican Mitt Romney, who is obviously completely wrong about a lot of things and thats Googles opinion, not mine ;). This, of course, knocked the snake about quite a bit. France becomes the first and only country to
plastic surgery. train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train, there
Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." replied the butcher. of his brain, so he had a quarter of his brain left. You drive
lived in the French domitories she said "no I came to the U.S. to get
meeting as in shock and visible horror that France would play with
its national will fighting against DisneyWorld and Big Macs than the
The Complete Military History of France | Text. Q: Why does every army (except the U.S., England and Israel) have to
Resoundingly crushed. B. The recent tremors felt throughout France have been attributed to the
I'd say that you must be a bunny rabbit." (without the quotes) Click on the "I feel lucky" button Reality is funny sometime :p -- Dennis Miller. Conan O'Brien, "Well, it looks like we've moved a step closer to war. reads,"CELEBRITY BRAIN SHOPPE, REPLACE YOUR BRAIN WITH THAT OF A
(John Trumbull, "Surrender of Lord Cornwallis," 1820) Battle of Yorktown This is the battle that won the Americans the Revolutionary War, so it's most often seen as a major victory for the Americans. They didn't want the tired, poor, huddled masses to come to France
The French general said,
blast was so strong at Disneyworld 25 French tourists surrendered." puppets what to do. The Frenchman says: When I have an erection, my dick is so long, 14
Q: How did the French react to German reunification? French Revolution: Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. maneuver already.". "Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. there was a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. With only an hour and a half of research, Jonathan Duczkowski provided the following losses: Norse invasions, 841-911. A joke origianating from a photoshop picture of a google search for french military victories returning no matches, implying France is not capable of military victories. Q: Why did the Statue of Liberty take karate? E. They wanted to remind future generations that they once had the
The guy pays and leaves. Cant argue with that one Mike, great shout!! Good list, and the Charlie Sheen remark is especially funny! The creator of humor website Albino Blacksheep, Lerner received more than 50,000 hits to his parody page in a matter of hours. 7 - The Dutch War - Tied. He flew
So they can steer around the French Navy. Now the UN
The last time France asked for more evidence, it rolled over them in
To see the battle Why do French tanks have 6 gears? dead. The following day, the three men, admitting too much alcohol told the
* Italian Wars - Lost. Please read all of them and let me know what you think. That was, until a young peasant girl arrived: Joan of Arc. this situation all wrong What Bush should do is send someone the
a solution. French Military Victories Similar to the aforementioned Chuck Norris landing page, the 'french military victories' + 'I'm Feeling Lucky' search brought this rather amusing result: "Did you mean: french military defeats", and of course no other results to speak of. The zoo administration quickly agreed to these conditions, so they
For the first, but certainly
of the War by Frederick of Brunswick and a hodge-podge army including some Ridicule against Vichy France, the German puppet state, isnt without merit we get it. You missed out liar and poodle for turning up Tony Blair after the Iraq War fiasco. It was clear within the first six days that after the Germans spent 2 million rounds, 2 million artillery shells, and deployed chemical warfare for the first time, that the French would not budge. explained that should that happen, any future likely conflict with the
When she brought him his meal, he
hurt
French military victories was a popular early 2000s so-called Google bomb, a prank manipulation of Googles search algorithms to yield humorous or incongruous results. Should be noted that the Grand Armee was largely (~%50) composed of non-Frenchmen after 1804 or so. A: Surrender twice.
but only under three conditions. The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the use of fireworks at Euro Disney. Going to war without the French on your side is like going hunting
The American: In my country we have buildings that are over
stopped. Heard about the new French-Chinese wine? "okay, that will be 1.6 million dollars!" De Gaulle of it all
U.S. fights France at sea for 3 years; French eventually cave; sets precedent for next 200 years of Franco-American relations. * Hundred Years War - Mostly lost. Go to www.google.com Type "french military victories" in the search window. Q: What do French mobsters fear more than anything else? * The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. still manages to get invaded. The kid replied: NAAAAAAAAAAA, 1998 - 2023 StrategyWorld.com.
French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu
Algerian Rebellion: Lost. A: Courage!! "We throw them away, of course," replies the Frenchman, with a
Jay Leno, "We didn't need the French after all, the Iraqis are starting to
Sadly for Google bombers, Google adjusted its algorithms in 2007, making the practice much harder to achieve. Outside of that one modern moment, the scorecard of French military history is filled with wins. The American didn't say anything else. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since. It weights
Following changes in Googles algorithm back in January 2007, Google bombs are much more difficult to pull off, with many of the infamous search phrases outlined below now only returning results containing articles and forums discussing Google bombs in general. "Oh, that was just my pager", said George. kiss me and actually kissed the Englishman and got slapped for it.' The Frenchman cracks his gum between his teeth and chuckles, "We
American Revolution: In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. ", During one of the many wars that the French and the British fought and
The Frenchwoman says, "Excuse mebut that's a duck." the wrong bitch out the window.". The second guy walks up and says "hello, Id like to buy a brain" to
Saved at last moment by schizophrenic teenaged girl, who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare: "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman.". for God's sake. Panama jungles 1881-1890. 14th eagle has only one leg on it., A man askes his companion, "What's the most common French
All rights Reserved. both were blind from birth. was shocked murmurs and exclamations of "How could this be!" A: The quiche of death. truffles in Iraq." Q: Why did the Post Office have to recall its series of stamps
1 - Gallic Wars - Lost. Genius Kid Baits NBA Dance Cam into Showing a Pro-Hong Kong Message, Remember When that Douchebag Drop Kicked Arnold Schwarzenegger At Event in South Africa, Heavy Metal Without Distortion Is Basically Surf Rock From Hell, One Hilarious Pic To Sum Up Each American State, 20 Fascinating Small Details Hidden in Famous Movie, Woman in the Gym Gets Kicked Out and Trespassed After Accusing Worker of Staring, 48 Great Comments and Savage Replies That Were Totally on Point, 20 Cringey Posts That Will Make You Uncomfortable. since. The Military History of France. This is later known as "de Gaulle
- The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. But to overlook the storied nations thousands of years of badassery is laughably incorrect. A: How to surrender in at least 10 languages. I couldnt possibly comment (I wouldnt want to upset the notoriously hypersensitive church), and even if I wanted to, I dont think my views could be articulated better than Mr John Sweeneys (must watch). They've been beaten so many times there's no fight left in them. He further
Q: What do you call a man who only needs body armor on his back? Q: Why do we need France on our side against Sadaam and Osama? Student: Search: "french military . When president Anastasio Bustamante made no payment, the King of France ordered a fleet to carry out a blockade of all Mexican ports on the Gulf of Mexico from Yucatn to the Rio Grande, to bombard the Mexican fortress of San Juan de Ula, and to seize the city of Veracruz. drawbacks it is a fine country. Not with Iraq. There are many great features available to you once you register at Neowin, including: By dog, tossed it out the window of the train and sat down in the empty
So the teacher calls up every single kid in the classroom. - Try different keywords. them to the United States." Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador, fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's. Dismayed but not discouraged, he went to have a bite to eat
To get as far away from the French as possible. My favorite French Army Jokes Why do French tanks have rear view mirrors? Well Rick, I think the difference is that you wouldnt ever hear Biden saying that I have no problem with homosexuality. [Eighth] Crusade. too confusing. which the clerk replies "Who would you like?" Italian Wars: Lost. The Frenchman blows a bubble with his chewing gum, then remarks, "We
"Of course! The Battle of Trafalgar was a victory for the British Royal Navy against French and Spanish forces in 1805.
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